Gentlemen. Welcome to One ManUP. How’re we doing today? You Good? We Good?
About to get a whole lot better now.
You know sometime last year I was feeling this constraint. I was stuck in a routine, meeting the same people, in and out, dining at the same places, basically operating like a machine.
I sat down with a glass of wine ( Yes I drink wine. Men are allowed to drink wine ) and started the self introspection with Miles Davis playing in the back.
An hour and a bottle of wine later, I realised I had more or less interacted with the same faces for the past two years for the majority of time. That’s not to say they were bad people. They are some of the best people I know.
But once a while a new face comes by with a new perspective, a new dynamic, a new outlook, and forces you to centre yourself again.
And let me be honest, I wasn't too alpha-ish about the whole thing initially. I felt a bit awkward at the idea of making new friends at first you know.. You know how you're suppose to do that in school or college or at work. But then I thought to myself, the world is HUGE, with tons of beautiful intelligent people out there.
GRAB EM !!
Literally Grab Em! They'll make your life rich like well grown coffee beans.
And I have always understood and appreciated the importance your immediate circle has on you. Believe me, it matters.
So Gentlemen, get ready to add a variety of sparks to your life. Here’s 10 tips on how to meet new people and make friends.
A. Step out of your radius.
You know what I'm talking about. We all have a daily routine of affairs that we carry out. And more often than not we are stuck in the same radius of places for the majority of the week.
Who says you have to wait for the weekend to meet new people.
Just shift a bit out of your zone.
Try getting your ground skim latte from a different Starbucks. Join a new gym, join a group. Social media today can help you in seconds to find people with similar interests. So technically you don't even need to hunt.
B. Smile Gentlemen.
Smile and start the conversation. It never hurts to initiate. It shows you have confidence and going after what you want.
And heck why not. You're going after a positive change in your life, give the beautiful people of this universe a chance to know you for the machine of machismo you are.
C. See someone you find interesting? Pay a compliment!
Everyone likes getting compliments. I don’t care if you're Voldemort.
Also its a natural ice breaker.
D. Avoid headphones when you're in a public space, say a coffee shop, a book shop or a museum.
Nothing wrong with wearing headphones. But it just has this “ I’m in my zone “ appeal.
Now as much as you don’t, someone who doesn't know you doesn't know that.
Give them a chance to come up to you without feeling afraid that you'll shoo em away Superstar.
E. Listen more Speak less.
Show that you're interested in knowing who they are what they do .. basically what they're made of.
F. Which brings me to point number 7.
NEVER EVER EVER NEVER CRIB.
Honestly. You just met someone and you're gonna talk about how your boss hates you or how your puppy got sick?
Nope. Nein. Niet. Not happenin.
G. Maintain good eye contact.
Personally I feel the best way to know a person. Look into their eyes and you'll really see them.
Cheeky I know.
But it works.
H. Meet them with a proper handshake. Side hug when you leave.
And by proper I don't mean crush their hands Tarzan.
Grasp their hands properly to a count of three.. 1 .. 2 ….3 and let go. A side hug when you leave is just fine.
I. Move from one spot to another while conversing.
What this does is it adds dynamics to the scenario. The other person also starts investing in you if they already haven't by stepping around.
Started at the coffee counter? Grab a seat.
Talking next to the mystery books section? Go to the Architecture section!
J. And the last one.
Gentlemen be yourself. You might not see it . But people can catch you in a second when you're not being yourself.
So be yourself and show the bundle of awesomeness you are.